Shoulda Coulda Woulda

7 Aug

Foggy Morning -1

Ever have regrets? Yes? Let me share a secret with you….so have I. So have millions, if not billions, of others. Few are those who have never had a regret.

Said the wrong thing at the wrong time? Been there. Oh boy…have I been there. Whether innocent or with intent of some kind, my mouth has babbled some doozys. Missed an opportunity for whatever reason? Done that. To all those things and more, perhaps this should be our response – shoulda coulda woulda.

Do you dwell on those wrong things said at the wrong time? Those missed opportunities? Whatever that thing is that makes you regret? I sometimes do. Regret can be a good thing. For instance, regret softens our heart to ask for forgiveness. Regret can help us pause and take inventory of what went wrong; what we should do different next time. But a sustained period of regret? It’s pointless. It’s wasted time. It’s an emotional infection that if not dealt with quickly will spread and turn into a multitude of other infections. Anger. Jealousy. Insecurity. Apathy. This list could go on and on.

Want some antidotes for regret? Give yourself a break. We all make mistakes (thankfully my wife has not yet given up on reminding me of that). Laugh at yourself. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Find the good in the situation that brought regret. Every situation has some good we can pull out of it if we look hard enough. Learn from what happened. Seek out others who have gone through similar situations and how they moved forward. Call a very good friend, a best friend. They will listen, they will empathize, they will give advice if you ask for it or if they feel the timing is right but they will be too enamored of you to let you stagnate in your regret. This list should go on and on.

Shoulda coulda woulda. You can’t change the past. But you can always shape your future.

Speaking of regrets, I had one this morning albeit a -10 on a scale of 1 to 10. Yesterday morning while I was driving to work, I saw a field of fog that I wanted to capture today if it showed up again. It did. And I kind of squandered the opportunity. I didn’t leave early enough. I wasted time trying to park as I wasn’t real familiar with parking around there. By the time I got parked, most of the spectacular colors from the impending sunrise (what’s known as the Blue Hour in this case) above the fog was gone. But I was there and made the most of it.

I’ve missed a lot of photo opportunities. But I can’t have regrets about it. It doesn’t bring anything back. What’s happened has happened. But what I do try to do is find the good in it. I was able to create the image above that really resonated with me and I feel is worthy enough to share with you and others. Even more important, I was still able to enjoy the moment that I was not able to capture. I was blessed to see what I saw yesterday while driving and I was blessed to see the spectacular colors of the impending sunrise. Don’t forget to live in the moment.

Oh, and that parking fiasco? I ended up parking at the end behind several other cars alongside the curb of the street. I quickly jumped out, thought someone had left their lights on in the car in front of me, grabbed my gear and ran through the thickly carpeted field of tall grass, thistles, flowers and the like to find a good spot to capture what was left of the colors and the fog. When I got back to my car, at first I couldn’t find where I had parked. And then it hit me. I had actually parked in a line of cars that were waiting for the DMV to open. It had spilled all the way back onto the street quite a ways. While I was out shooting, 4-5 other cars had parked behind me. Fortunately, the line had not moved one inch. I casually walked to my car past the ones behind me, got in and took off. LOL!

3 Responses to “Shoulda Coulda Woulda”

  1. Wanda Hadeen August 7, 2018 at 4:16 pm #

    I think the fog photo is beautiful. Also thought the blog accompanying it was so well written. Thank you


  2. Penelope Hadeen August 7, 2018 at 5:25 pm #

    Nice job honey!

    Thank you, Penelope Hadeen Sent from my iPhone




  1. Never Far | stephen hadeen photography - November 5, 2018

    […] Shoulda Coulda Woulda […]


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